


Fucking brain

by herilaveur



Series: ELU saison 6 [8]
Category: SKAM (France)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-15
Updated: 2020-06-15
Packaged: 2021-03-04 04:28:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,624
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24727516
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/herilaveur/pseuds/herilaveur
Summary: Sunday evening, at Eliott and Lucas' house - several hours after Mea Culpa...
Relationships: Eliott Demaury/Lucas Lallemant
Series: ELU saison 6 [8]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1740727
Comments: 15
Kudos: 147





	Fucking brain

**Author's Note:**

> And yes, it's me again... my husband decided to pretend to be Lucas and his insomnia came back... so he's not sleeping and neither am I, so my head had time to think and create the following...
> 
> because my heart is bleeding because of Lola...

He opens his eyes and immediately realizes that he is alone in bed. He tattoons in the dark looking for the lamp but it's as if everything has moved. When he finally finds the light, he immediately looks at the cushion but there are no words.

Usually he always leaves a note. 

Anxiety takes him. What if he's really gone? What if that night with Lola was their breaking point?

"Lucas? "

His voice is hoarse and his throat is dry, but he gets up and calls him.

"Lucas?"

The door opens and Eliott recoils in surprise to find Lucille.

"Lucille? What are you doing here? Where's Lucas?"

Lucille gives him the most exasperated look.

''He's the one who called me. He was totally lost, Eliott, it's too much for him. He'll never be able to handle it. But don't worry, I'm here."

She tries to put her hand on his arm, but Eliott steps back.

''What did you think, Eliott? That he loved you? That he'd put up with this for you? Only I really love you, darling. Only I do. We'll forget all about it and we'll be all right again."

Eliott shakes his head sharply. And that's when he realizes he's in his room at his parents' house. But how could he not notice it before? 

''I don't want to forget it, Lucille. I love him. I'm in love with him. More than I've ever loved you."

Eliott doesn't miss Lucille's angry face and her change of mood.

''But what did you think, Eliott? You broke into a houseboat to fuck him? You're maniac, Eliott, it's not love, you can't love! Besides, he won't stand for it! Nobody can handle your fits."

Eliott pushes her and runs out of the apartment. He has to find Lucas. And he knows where to go. Where only Lucas can find him.

He arrives at his secret bridge and sits down next to one of the pillars.

''Eliott?''

Eliott is startled.

''Eliott? What are you doing here?''

Eliott sighs and looks at her.

"I'm waiting for Lucas."

Lola looks at him like he's an idiot and shakes her head.

''He's not coming, Eliott. He's not like us. He doesn't understand us. He's only with you to prove to himself that he's not so fucked up."

Eliott shakes his head and cries.

"No, Lucas is not like that."

"They're all like that," Lola gets angry. "He doesn't love you, Eliott. He likes to be your savior. He loves that you're dependent on him. He's only waiting for one thing, and that's the next time you fuck up!"

Eliott looks at her and starts crying.

''No. No. No. No.''

And that's when he hears it.

"Eliott? Eliott?''

Eliott starts crying even harder, with his head in his arms. 

''You're not alone. I'm right here. You're not alone anymore."

Lucas' voice is calm, and yet Eliott feels his hands shaking on him. 

He looks up and the light blinds him. For a few seconds, he sees nothing, but he hears Lucas.

''Damn it, Eliott, fuck you.''

Eliott steps back, frowning. Why is Lucas telling him that? Why doesn't he sound angry when he says it? He looks amused. But why would he be amused? Eliott has to think. He's heard Lucas say that before, with that amusement in his voice... and then he remembers.

''Ok, so welcome to the house, Fifi''

Eliott sees Lucas in front of him, half exasperated, half amused, looking at him before he hugs him and caresses Fifi. 

He closes his eyes and Lola's words are back in his head.

''You're naive. Are you afraid of what Lucas would say?"

"I'd say that's wonderful, Eliott. Holy shit, do you really want to live together?"

Lucas' voice is so much louder than Lola's. Eliott remembers his smile when he asked him to move in together. And all of a sudden, only Lucas' voice resounds in his head.

''It's perfect, Eliott.'' "I love you." ''Who cares, my love'' ''It's so beautiful. You're beautiful. "Are you serious, did you film that?" "In all the universes." "I'm so proud of you.'' "When we're 50, when we're married, when we go to Kathmandu," "I love you so much!" "You are the man of my life, Eliott Demaury. "Oh, my God, Eliott, you are unbelievable.'' "The only thing that makes me feel at home here is you.'' ''There's not a possible universe where I'm not in love with you for the rest of my life.''

Eliott opens his eyes and he's startled when he realises he's in their bedroom. Holy shit, it was just a dream. Or hallucinations, he doesn't really know. Either way, it was just his fucking brain. He's rethinking the scene with Lucille. That's exactly what they said to each other after the houseboat. And she was so wrong. And Lola was wrong, too. The houseboat wasn't the best story ever. Lucas suffered so much that night because of him.

And only then does Eliott realize that lucas isn't in the room with him. And there's no note on his pillow. He's grabbing his phone. Sunday - 8:56 p.m. but no message from Lucas. He gets up, forgetting that his whole body is hurting him. He opens the bedroom door but the apartment is plunged into darkness. Eliott feels the tears rising and he hears a muffled sob.

There are two seconds before his brain can figure out that the sob is not coming from him. And only now, he notices the line of light under the bathroom door and he hears the sound of water. 

He gently opens the bathroom door, not wanting to scare Lucas. And he sees him in the reflection of the mirror. Lucas is in the shower, his head down, holding one hand on the wall and holding his other hand over his mouth to muffle the sound of his sobs. 

And seeing it hurts but it comforts Eliott at the same time. Lola was wrong about everything. If Lucas was just waiting for Eliott's next bullshit, he wouldn't be so distraught. If Lucas was the way she thinks he is, he wouldn't care. And clearly he cares. She doesn't know him.

Eliott steps forward and pushes up the shower curtain to snuggle with Lucas. Lucas screams with surprise and Eliott almost expects him to push him away but immediately Lucas hugs him and sniffs.

The hot water burns his skin even through his shirt but Eliott doesn't care.

''They were wrong.''

Lucas steps back to dry his tears and looks at Eliott.

''Who?"

''Lola. And Lucille. They were so wrong. They don't know us. They don't understand our love. I love you so much, Lucas. I'm so sorry."

Lucas looks lost and then frowns.

"Have you seen Lucille?"

Eliott shakes his head, then nods and shakes again.

''No. Yes. In my head. I was back at my parents' house with her, it was after the houseboat. She told me that I couldn't love you and that you would never be able to stand it. And she was so wrong. I love you so much, Lucas I've never loved anyone the way I love you.'' Eliott hugs Lucas a little tighter before he steps back to look at him. ''I heard you, you know. I only heard you. It was like all the wonderful things you've said to me since we've known each other are burned into my memory and come back to keep me from going crazy.''

''You're not crazy, love. I'm here now. I love you too and I'll keep telling you that so your fucking brain never doubts us again. I love you, Eliott. You're the man of my life.''

Eliott smiles as the shower water runs down his face. 

"In all the universes.''

"Exactly.''

Lucas is holding him tight, but he immediately backs away.

''You're soaking wet, Eliott. You'll catch cold. May I?"

Eliott nods his head and Lucas helps him undress. He washes his hair and finally the hot water is good for Eliott.

"I want to make love with you, Lucas."

Eliott's voice is less hoarse, but it's not as sensual as he'd like it to be. Lucas hugs him but shakes his head.

''Me too. But not like that."

Lucas turns off the water and gets out of the shower first. He quickly wipes himself dry and ties a towel around his waist before handing his to Eliott, who does the same. 

Eliott takes the hand that Lucas holds out to him and follows him to their room. Lucas lies on his back and gently pushes Eliott to lie down next to him. He opens the bedside table drawer and pulls out a black felt pen and sits astride Eliott.

Eliott frowns and Lucas smiles tenderly at him before kissing him.

''I'm gonna make love to you, Eliott. But no sex. Not because I don't want to, but because it's not what you need."

Lucas takes Eliott's wrist and write : _I love you so much it hurts._

And then he takes his other arm and he write _When I fall asleep, I look at your picture if you're not with me._

He kisses Eliott's chest and then he writes around his tattoo, _My life I want to live it with you._

He goes down and writes on Eliott's belly, _I feel butterflies in my belly every time you laugh._

And he's gonna keep doing that until there's not an inch of skin left on Eliott...

And Eliott will spend the rest of the night drawing hedgehogs and raccoons in love on Lucas' body...

And they will fall asleep, entwined against each other, thinking only of their love, as if they were alone in their universe...

**Author's Note:**

> admit that you were scared when you saw Lucille 😈 😃 😆 🤣
> 
> I'm sorry, when I don't get enough sleep, I become a bad person 😈😈...


End file.
